SO....I am new to this whole blog thing....I guess what got me thinking about starting one was that next weekend, on 8/13/11 is SlutWalk D.C. Now, I know that SlutWalk SOUNDS like a terrible thing, but, its actually one of the most empowering and brave things that I have ever heard of for one of the least acknowledged groups out there. The story behind it is (in short!) is that in Toronto, Canada, a police officer was addressing some women about violence, and told them that if they would stop dressing like sluts, they wouldn't get victimized.....yeah--that blew me away! And apparently alot of other women too. SlutWalk emerged first in Toronto, with women marching, dressed like sluts, regular people, and otherwise, to say that it does NOT matter what you wear, no one is asking to be raped, and that instead of teaching "Don't get raped", how about we say "DONT RAPE!"...so, this movement has now gone global, from India to England, and now, closer to me, in Washington D.C. It's still quite a drive from me, but one that is SO worth it.

I have been raped twice now, once at the age of 14 by a classmate during my freshman year of highschool, and again at 26 years old, by an acquaintance. I won't go into the details for now, but,  I will say that it's been a long hard road to say the very very least. I am now approaching my 30th birthday, and it's now been 3 1/2 years since the second attack. Amazingly, my life is awesome....and not only is my happiness, my husband, my career, and really my life at the moment a complete and total surprise.....but--I never thought that after the second rape, that I could ever be happy again, or would ever fully recover.

SlutWalk D.C. is SUCH an important thing for me--and hopefully alot of other people will recognize it's significance as well. I can't begin to say how much I am looking forward to marching with ALL of those other people, who have been where I've been, felt how I've felt, and who are brave enough to tell the world to stop victim blaming. That what a woman wears is NOT an excuse for sexual violence. That a short skirt is not an invitation--that a low-cut blouse has nothing to do with anyone else. And to add to my anxiety, (LOL!), I will be speaking at this event--I will be standing on stage, and telling my story. I'll speak for about 2-3 minutes, and then introduce an AMAZING and very incredible woman, Andrea Bredbeck. She has started a documentary and organization called "Join The Conversation", where survivors and their families share their stories and feelings about rape--and one of the best things to me is at the end of several of her short films, she says, quite frankly yet poignantly,  "Rape Sucks". Incredible. Here is her link:

http://www.facebook.com/RapeHurtsEveryone?ref=ts

I hope that someone reads this, and maybe it helps them feel less alone....there is something so oddly isolating about rape and abuse. But, please know, you are NOT alone--there are more people out there who have been where you are than not,....it's just hard to talk about it sometimes. And the way I have seen it over the years, the way I saw it after my first assault at 14--either you understand rape, or you don't....either your on the inside, or the other side....what feels like the outside..where seemingly no one understands what has happened, or how you're feeling, or what you're going through. It feels almost worse than the attack itself. The emotional slap in the face. But, on the other side, there's alot of survivors.....and alot to share. Thanks for reading this.....take good care!